The Baby Project
by JellalNeedsCake
Summary: Lucy and Natsu are best friends at Fairy Tail Boarding Academy, she is the hopeless romantic and he couldn't care less. She's the smart ass and he's the dumb ass. He's on the football team while she's in the creative writing club. Natsu and Lucy may be close but they're about to get a whole lot closer when paired up for the project set up by Coach Markarov: the baby project.
1. The Start

The Baby Project - The Start

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Coach Markarov was fast asleep in the corner as everyone watched in disgust at the birthing video. There was so much blood, so much screaming and so much crying. I had to do that one day... hell no. I think I'm going to adopt, I suggested to my little sister Michelle who was wide eyed in fear. On the other side of me was Wendy Marvell who was to innocent for her own good, behind us was our friends - Juvia, Levy, Cana, Kinana, Mirajane, Erza, Evergreen, Bisca, Aries and Lisanna.

Only Mirajane and Lisanna seemed to be unfazed by the video that was playing. Lisanna always had marriage and kids on her mind and she tried to make a partner of everyone in class. She was going to marry Natsu, then she realised he was to immature then Laxus and she realised he was to much of a pervert. The girl was to fussy, but again I think I was to.

I looked over to where my best friend Natsu was sitting, and he was disgusted as the video carried on playing. The boys at the other side of the class were now looking to Bacchus as he was selling condoms. I sighed at the amount of creepers were in the classroom. If Coach Markarov was trying to put us off sex, he is certainly going off in the right direction.

Me and Natsu had the same expression etched on our faces and to think Mirajane wanted me to go through that thirty three times. That damn cupid...

I watched in hysterics when Minerva and her gang of wannabe's said they were going to have a caesarean, and surgery so they wouldn't get stretch marks and Flare Corona just agreed with everything she had said. Flare used to be our best friend until she decided she wanted to become more like Minerva. A bitch...

Life was extremely odd in Fairy Boarding Academy and Coach no Pervert Markarov just had to be our sex education teacher. I sat back and watched Juvia, she was paying no attention at all the 'miracle of giving birth' video. Juvia only had one thing on her mind and that was her precious Gray-sama. I laughed at how she could literally pay no attention in class and still come out with straight As.

The video had stopped playing and everyone calmed down. That video was what we didn't want to see on a last lesson on a Friday afternoon. The class soon went back to normal with Levy's two personal stalkers fighting over who is going to ask her to prom, Cana, Laxus & Bacchus drinking, Erza discussing things with the class president Jellal, Bisca & Alzack being High School sweethearts and Gray & Natsu fighting.

" Gray your clothes!" Juvia sweat dropped as Natsu put Gray down.

The resident playboys Loke and two of the Trimens came up to my table, where Wendy blushed at the sight of Eve, Hibiki was flirting with Michelle and Loke was calling me his Princess. Then to make things worse my own personal stalker Damn Straight had started fighting with him... Why did I get these types? I watched my best guy friend Natsu go through a similar situation to one of myself because Minerva and her cronies decided they took a liking to pink.

Coach Markarov soon woke up, and brought out a tub of what I assumed was baby simulators... I started to deflate when I realised that we were going to have to do the dreaded Baby Project. If I was paired up with Loke, Damn Straight or someone like Gray, where I'll attract Juvia's attention - I'm dropping this class. Well technically I couldn't drop it but I could skive... Please let it be someone like Hibiki or Warren or Freed, someone I stand the chance of getting along with.

" Ah screw it! I'm going back to sleep, I can't keep forcing you brats to do everything on my orders, brats just pick your partner and wake me up when you are done," He muttered.

My best friend Natsu immediately went over to my side and took a seat opposite me, Michelle and Wendy. As soon as a teacher said partner me and Natsu went immediately towards each other, it was like a reflex now since Middle School. Nobody could break us apart.

" Luigi you are raising a kid with me weirdo!" Natsu smiled as I banged him on the head for him calling me Luigi.

" Or you could come with me Princess Peach," Damn Straight remarked. Why was he making Mario references?

" No No No! I'm happy with being Natsu's Luigi," I said as damn straight wouldn't buzz off, I looked at Natsu for help but he wasn't giving any help at all, he was basically laughing at me with his exceed Happy. I hated him so much sometimes and now I was getting angry that he didn't warn any guys off.

" Natsu you could basically help me! I chose you as a partner and guys are still coming near me! PLEASE for the love of Mavis!" I shouted.

" Aww Lucy is getting sad that Natsu isn't jealous!" Minerva remarked as I face palmed. For once couldn't the pink hair idiot HELP me?

" Oh shut up Minerva and stop ruining my ship!" Mirajane had been shipping me and Natsu ever since we came up from Middle School. I think the girl read to many fanfictions, she had started to apply it to real life.

I realised the coach's choice of letting us pick a partner wasn't the wisest of choices, as soon the classroom went into chaos with a three way cat fight between Minerva, Mary Hughes and Milliana over Sting Eucliffe the most popular guy in our class, Sting decided to let his Exceed Lector pick his 'wife,' and Lector picked Milliana since she rescued him from Minerva when she was punishing him for calling Minerva desparate. I noticed how Wally was slightly disappointed.

Loke asked his best friend Aries to be his partner and Evergreen decided that she would ask Elfman.

" The baby has to be a man!" Elfman had a slap mark on his face from Ever's prada bag.

After that there I just noticed controlled chaos eventually our class presidents Jellal and Erza just took charge of organising everyone. The first issue they dealt with was Levy and her two stalkers. They paired the two stalkers up together as Levy's partner came from an unlikely source.

" I want the bookworm as my wife," Gajeel spoke.

" Wait what!" Levy exclaimed, I could see it now Gajeel would probably leave Levy holding the baby.

" Well thats settled than," Erza moved onto the next couple of dilemmas as I noticed how Michelle was starting to get scared about Hibiki, Ren and Ichiya came towards her. And Wendy was looking extremely disappointed when Eve and Romeo Conbolt went over to Chelia Blendy. Bisca and Alzack paired off with each other and Kinana and Cobra paired off with each other. And I think Jellal asked Erza, disappointing his fangirls.

I decided to help Michelle out, my little sister wasn't going to be paired up with someone who would take advantage of the fact that they were going to be at our house. I looked around the room. Bixlow would probably hold a party, Yuka was to quiet, Midnight was to scary, Damn Straight would probably use this an opportunity to stalk me, there was something about Rogue which I didn't think would fit with Michelle, Hibiki paired off with Jenny Realight. Then I saw... Warren.

Warren was perfect for Michelle. He may have prominent lips, but the boy was kind and always had time to spare to listen to other peoples worries. If two people were fighting, he would always break them apart as he could somehow sense how the two people were feeling. So I wondered why he was sitting there quietly, even his best friend Max didn't take much notice of him.

" Michelle go ask Warren," I suggested. I looked at my little sister who was looked over at Warren and she seemed happy with my choice. Me, Wendy and Natsu watched as Michelle made her way over to Warren.

" Hey I'm Michelle Heartfelia, I'm wonder if you would like to be my partner?" She smiled as Warren got the shock of his life, and it made sense why he was upset he didn't think he'd be asked.

" Michelle is so nicer than you Lucey," Happy teased as I punched him.

" Gray would you care to be my partner," Angel asked and the whole class was silent. Juvia had been unleashed. I forgot about the 'Heavenly Sisters' part of Minerva's cronies - Angel and Yukino Aguria. Yukino seemed to have paired off with Rogue while Angel was having trouble finding her partner. As Juvia made her deathly glare towards Angel, Angel took the hint and grabbed Damn Straight. Juvia went towards her precious Gray-sama.

" Juvia would like Gray-sama to be her partner," Juvia went up to class's stripper and a close friend of me and Natsu. As Lyon his older brother, was getting annoyed. I kind of felt for Lyon as he did genuinely like Juvia but I was pretty sure that Gray did like Juvia in his own special way.

" Sure why not, you can be my wife Juvia," Mirajane our class's cupid was happy while Juvia was ecstatic and saying she had beaten all her love rivals. As Angel realised how much of a creeper that Damn Straight actually was. I noticed an argument that was going on between Bacchus and Cana.

" How the fuck could you ask someone else Bacchus?" Cana drowned some more whiskey as she Mary Hughes accepted Bacchus's request.

" Cana we only spent one night together and I have your bra, you are nothing special!" Bacchus and Mary laughed.

" What did you say about Cana Alberona?" It was Laxus, football captain, Grandson of Coach, the toughest guy in our school, the resident heartbreaker, Natsu looked up to him during Football. " I'd take that back that back about the Daughter of Gildarts, if I was you." Laxus spoke.

" Cana you are Gildarts Daughter? The legendary rockstar Gildarts daughter! Fuck off Mary," Bacchus made Mary get off his arm while Cana turned her back and headed straight to Laxus.

" How the hell did you know that I was Gildarts Daughter! That was supposed to be a secret..." Cana looked unhappy.

" Gildarts sent me in to look after you," Laxus spoke as I and everyone else reeled in shock. " Now unless you want Daddy to know about your drinking sessions at school, I'd suggest you be my partner!" Laxus grinned as I guessed that Cana could only see she had to accept his offer. Bacchus realised his loss and went back to his church girl Mary.

The class was reeling from the news, I saw Mirajane was still staring at certain green haired boy who followed Laxus about, there was something special about the friendship between Evergreen, Laxus, Freed and Bixlow. They were all one as a kind but together they threw the most legendary parties. The Thunder God Tribe were going to organise the end of years prom as well. I couldn't wait...

I watched as Mirajane rejected every single guy that laid eyes on her and waited patiently for Freed, but when she saw Freed go up to the feminist group Mermaid Heel's Ariana Webb. She got really angry, it was like the cupid had been possessed.

" Freed!" Mirajane shouted and all eyes went on her.

" Um... hi Mira, er-," Freed was stuttering, being the socially awkward nerd that he was he didn't know what to do in these sort of situations, he just mostly followed Laxus's orders and let Evergreen & Bixlow party, I thought.

" I just wanted to ask if you would be my partner for the Baby Project," Mirajane asked sweetly, as ten boys looked at Mirajane and then looked at Freed... They didn't get it. I smiled Freed and Mirajane were so cute together, he has always talked to her but I don't he knew Mirajane was interested in him.

" I'd love to Mirajane!" Freed responded. Everyone cheered when Bixlow held Freed's and Mira's arms up.

Wendy, Lisanna, Minerva and her cronies were starting to get worried. Minerva needed a guy on her arm that could match her most popular girl status. I laughed at Minerva as she rejected everyone but I smiled when Gray's older sister Ultear and her best friend Meredy decided to raise a kid together. Turned out Lisanna needn't worried, Bixlow came to her rescue as Midnight came up to her. I heard him whisper...

" I'm Freed's wigman, you should help be Mirajane's so we might as well pair up unless you wanna go with Midnight over there?" I laughed at them both, they were opposites in every way but they were so damn cute!

I examined the scene as Wendy, Coco and Chelia were facing their own problems with Eve and Romeo, not even the class presidents Erza and Jellal could sort it. Three girls and two boys, both boys wanted Chelia, Coco and Wendy was just there... As Lyon's back up plan Sherry had gone off with one of the trimens - Ren. Chelia desperately wanted to be with her own precious Lyon-sama, so Lyon agreed to let Chelia be his partner which made the girl over the moon. What was with the Fullbusters and their obessive fan girls I thought? Coco decided that she wanted Eve as he was more popular and she wanted to make Mary Hughes jealous that she was with Bacchus and not with someone popular. So that left Romeo and Wendy, which made poor Wendy feel like third choice. Gajeel, Natsu and Jellal were not happy with the upset look on her face.

" If you hurt my little sister Romeo!" Gajeel punched his desk.

" I'll kill you if you hurt her!" I watched as Natsu got out of his seat, and warned the boy.

" Nobody is going to hurt Jellalnette unless they wanna answer to the class-president!" Jellal smirked. I think it made sense now why not many boys wanted to date Wendy...

At the other end of the class room, Minerva had Rufus Lohr under her wraps. One of the richest boys who's Father was on the board of directors at Sabertooth. Minerva didn't seem happy with the choice though but she dealt with her cronies by herself but for some reason she wasn't happy with Yukino, I noticed. I think it was because Yukino had a richer partner in Rogue Cheney. Probably Minerva felt shown up.

Coach Markarov finally woke up though and he saw us all sitting in our pairs, apart from Midnight who was alone with his creepy stick.

" Right now time to give you brats, your own brats!" Everyone sighed as Erza and Jellal went up first to collect their kid.

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What do you think? It'll be set in Fairy Academy apart from there is a few changes such as Markarov isn't a student and Fairy Academy is a boarding school :)

I'll promise it'll be more funnier as we progress through the story :0

Milliana and Sting are now my favourite crack pairing of choice :) More Sting and Milliana fics please fanfic writers ;) Also seriously most of the characters aren't going to be even dating, just raising a baby simulator together ^.^ It may lead into something more between the characters though...


	2. Nashi, Nandos and Nonsensical Notes

The Baby Project -

Day 1: Friday

Chapter 2 - Nashi, Nandos and Nonsensical Notes

The babies were things that looked they belonged in the Victorian era and we received bottles, cribs and clothes. The dolls were creepy and I was terrified especially when Damn Straight and Devil *cough* Angel got a doll that had one eye, Minerva's doll looked like an actual child and weirdly Erza & Jellal's had purple hair. Mirajane was fangirling, she didn't seem to care that her plastic doll looked like something from a horror movie. Freed did though and he pushed the kid over to Mirajane.

Juvia was ecstatic to be doing this project with Gray. She actually picked twins out of the box and everyone laughed at Juvia's expressions towards them both. To be fair Juvia's kids were the cutest dolls ever but Gray was not enjoying it all, he was really creeped out. To make the whole situation even worse, Lyon had a serious bite of the green eyed monster.

" Juvia loves her and Gray-sama's children!" Juvia laughed while Gray wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere.

Cana and Laxus were already arguing who was gonna keep the kid when they went out tonight. Midnight looked at the doll creepily, his doll was a perfect baby boy. There was no marks, smudges or dirt on Midnight's doll, but Midnight kept waving his creepy stick with a skull on, over the doll and kept chanting something. I was really disturbed at that point.

As me, Natsu and Happy went up to Coach Markarov, both of them were telling me to dive into the box and get a boy so they can call into Igneel. I ignored them and chose the one that was on top, it was a girl and both groaned at me. I laughed at their deflated faces, Natsu was sulking though but at least our kid didn't look that bad. She actually looked like Natsu, she had pink hair and a wide smile. The smile was a little bit to wide, and I knew if I woke up during the night, the doll would probably scare the living daylights out of me.

" Lucceee! Aww no why! I wanted a boy, so I could play sports with him! This isn't fair weirdo," Natsu said sulkily and I laughed at the dense idiot. How the hell did he expect to play sports with a plastic doll?

" Ok idiot I'm sorry! How about you pick her name?" I giggled at Natsu's delight. The teenage boy had a mental age of a 7 year old.

" She'll be called Nashi!" Natsu said.

" Why Nashi?" I questioned, I really liked the sound of the name.

" Na for Natsu and shi because it means ours," Natsu held her and I was pink as my best friends hair. It was the most adorable thing I have ever seen. I couldn't stop smiling after that, would Natsu be this sweet if we had a kid? Whoa Lucy, did I just think that? Wow! The bell went and all the guys were going to football practise, then normally me Levy, Jet and Droy were going off to creative writing club.

" No Lucceee! I want Nashi to watch me play!" Did I hear that right? Then all of sudden Cana's baby had started crying and Laxus watched in horror. Everyone was watching the devil spawn in horror, it was so loud? Then one by one the babies were reacting.

" Make it stop Laxus!" Cana ordered.

" You are its mother!" Laxus said and then Cana glared at him.

" I need a fucking drink! I'm to young to deal with this shit," Cana whined as Laxus looked like he was going to pull his hair out. Cana on the other hand threw the doll in the bin, and Laxus then scooped it out.

" Cana look after the fucking kid! I need to go to practise and don't throw it away, Gildarts will be pissed if he knew that you were failing," Laxus was severely annoyed and Cana was furious when he mentioned Gildarts.

" Fine whatever sparky but you still owe me," As Natsu, Gray, Gajeel, Jellal, Laxus, Rogue, Cobra and all the other football players ran onto the pitch. I followed them out and sat on the bleachers, Levy was sitting next to me and Juvia was on the other side. Minerva had already employed someone to look after her demon child as Rufus wasn't going to do it. The cheerleaders came out and I waved at Mirajane & Michelle, then Flare scowled at me.

" What the fuck is her problem?" Cana stood behind me and as I turned around, Cana was content at last, she had vodka and the baby was in her arms. So everything seemed alright on her side.

Out of the corner my eye I saw Erza bouncing the purple haired baby and she was pointing to Jellal. Erza was taking this family thing seriously, at the other corner of the bleachers I saw Freed holding the demon baby and Evergreen was sitting beside him with her little monster. Freed looked so out of place amongst the girls, Mirajane kept waving to him though. Freed was bothered about Laxus seeing him like that though and probably any of the football team. Warren was one row above him and he didn't seem particularly bothered, that the football team could see him with a plastic doll in his arms.

" Lu-chan this is so ridiculous," Levy sighed. " Why did I have to be partnered with him of all people?" Levy frowned.

" It's just two weeks Levy we can make it through," I smiled at the bluenette and she seemed a lot more comfortable.

" Where is Wendy though? I thought Romeo was on the football team, they can't have gone back to the house and they shouldn't be in the common room," I asked Levy and she couldn't see them either. " In fact where is Milliana, Lector and Sting?"

" Sting must have skipped practise as well," Cana suggested.

" Juvia thinks that Gray-sama and Juvia have the most perfect little family," Cana was trying to smother her laughter, as me and Levy giggled to ourselves, " Juvia decided to call her and Gray-sama's children Gray Junior and Marina," Juvia smiled.

Juvia did live in her own little bubble but what made it saddening was that she was so blind to Lyon's feelings towards her and how deep they were. I sometimes got the feeling Gray used Juvia's obsession with him to his advantage to get one over on his older brother but I also did think Gray did it unintentionally. The whole Gruvia vs Lyvia, was a widely discussed subject that even the school magazine well Levy did a poll on it. 49% voted for Gruvia and 51% voted for Lyvia. So it was that close but personally I didn't think Lyon had a chance.

We watched as the football game go on, me Levy and possibly Erza looked bored out of our minds while Cana just sat and drank. Juvia was cheering for Gray to score, to impress his twins and she also cheered for Lyon to. Juvia was now calling Lyon, " Uncle Lyon," so Lyon was basically possessing the ball and kept scoring every time Juvia cheered him on and Chelia Blendy was experiencing the green eyed monster. The cheerleaders also had a good practise and Mirajane was a excellent captain, no wonder why Minerva and her cronies also Jenny Realight wanted to be friends with her. I still can't believe that Mirajane is one of my friends, she is amazing and I think sometimes Lisanna felt inferior. I watched as Lisanna tried her best in practise but she couldn't do it as well as the others. When the game finally finished, I got up from the bleacher but my mind being elsewhere, somehow I fell onto the lower bleachers and I was literally rolling down to the bottom one and I was doing all I could to preserve the damn doll.

" LUCY!" Natsu yelled.

I closed my eyes waiting for a crash of some sort, but I landed on something and as I opened my eyes, I realised I had crashed on top of Rogue Cheney. How the hell did I do that? I then realised my boobs were in Rogue's face and I heard a little bit of laughter, from the football team and Natsu looked a little bit angry? I rubbed my eyes, I was seeing things.

" Oh no... I'm so sorry Rogue, curse my clumsiness," Rogue laughed at me and helped me up, he was smiling and he was basically laughing to himself.

" It's ok Lucy, at least your kid is fine! Speaking of which have you seen Yukino anywhere and Lucy do you fancy going on a date with me on Sunday?" I blushed. I realised that I had literally fallen onto the football field and now everyone was looking at me with amazement and worry. I looked at Nashi, she was still a pink haired grinning creep. She hadn't cried yet which was good.

" Yeah I'd love to go on a date with you on Sunday Rogue," I smiled and then I found Natsu crashing into my back.

" Luce that was AWESOME!" Natsu yelled. " You have to do that again! I can't believe you fell down that many rows of bleachers, how did you manage that you weirdo?" Gray hit him for me, then Jellal did, then Gajeel, then Loke did and then Laxus.

" Lucy are you okay?" Gray said as I wanted to go and crawl in a hole, the football team had me surrounded.

" Probably will have some bruises tomorrow but I'm good at least I think I am," I said. " Everyone still up for Nandos and Natsu where is Happy?" I asked then I noticed the damn cat had got a video of me falling down the bleachers on his AYE phone.

" Aye sir I'm up for Nandos!" Happy chorused then Natsu grinned.

" Who else is coming?" Laxus boomed.

" Well normally its me, Natsu, Michelle, Romeo, Wendy, Juvia, Elfman, Lisanna, Mirajane, Gray, Erza, Jellal, Loke and Levy but if you and Cana want to come thats fine with me, we'll just have to get two tables, and where is Romeo and Wendy?" None of the football team knew where Romeo was but Laxus agreed and then I received a text from Michelle saying Mirajane was going so was Freed and Warren.

" I'm coming as well, if the shrimp is going," Gajeel smirked.

As the football team walked over towards their lockers, I kept receiving stares from Flare and Erza glared at her, scaring Flare off. Levy, Juvia, Erza and Cana asked if I was alright and I nodded. I waited by the car park for Jellal and Natsu. I was not looking forward to this journey, Natsu has serious motion sickness and Jellal was a monster of a driver. And if Nashi or Erza's kid started crying, my head would probably explode.

As soon as Natsu set foot in the car, Natsu was knocked unconscious by Erza and I cowered in fear of my best friend. Jellal laughed at my reaction but I was literally terrified of Mother monster. Erza was beautiful though and one of the smartest people I knew, she was also a great fashion designer and she decided to make our prom dresses, well basically she told us she was making mine, Levy's, Mira's, Wendy's and Michelle's prom dresses. I didn't bothered to argue with her, she was a knight of fashion and she could basically create something beautiful in a minute.

As Natsu started to come round, we were already in Magnolia Town and outside of the Blue Pegasus shopping mall. I realised at that point the world had crazy, the trimens and their partners had been shopping for clothes for the doll. By the look of Sherry's and Ren's doll it was wearing gucci gear. I shook my head, but the trimens and Loke looked like they were having the time of their lives. Aries on the other hand looked like she was uncomfortable.

" I-I'm sorry Loke, I don't feel comfortable with dressing the doll up like this," Aries stuttered while Loke laughed and came rushing over towards us and Aries ran behind carrying the child.

" Ready for Nandos?" Loke asked and we nodded. Natsu was still woozy and he looked like he was spinning, I passed him Nashi and held him up as Jellal got to the other side of him and we basically dragged him their, where he soon perked up and the smell.

We spotted our group plus the Thunder God Tribe and Cana joining us. I grinned, everything seemed to be going to plan, none of the babies were crying and once we finally got in we basically had a massive table to ourselves, Romeo and Wendy finally showed up and they looked terrified and they finally revealed their kid who had a massive scar across it's neck and it seemed fairly obvious that someone glued it back together

" Charle couldn't take the constant crying," Wendy was nearly in floods of tears herself and Romeo put an arm around her, then Erza's monster was set off and Erza had the shock of her life, she threw the kid up in the air and Jellal caught it. That set off Gray and Juvia's twins, then Bickslow had a heart attack while his kid screamed but Lisanna calmed them all down.

" Lisanna you are a genius!" I spoke.

" I need to get an A on this class! I want to be a primary school teacher so I need to show I can look after babies," Lisanna smiled while Mirajane was asking for tips. Freed was left holding the devil spawn and Nashi was still grinning.

The waiter finally came around and let us order food, Natsu of course went for the spiciest thing going, and knowing him he probably had tobasco hidden somewhere. We were sitting next to Gajeel and Levy, where Gajeel now had christened me bunny girl because apparently I looked like a bunny because I looked frightened and defenceless with the children. I looked over to Michelle and Warren, they seemed to really have hit off. Loke was flirting with anything that had two legs and Aries looked like she wanted to die.

I left Nashi in the care of Natsu and Happy while I went to the toilet, Juvia, Cana and Mira. Juvia showed me her phone and it basically revealed that Lyon wanted to date her and he wanted to meet up at Lamia Scale Shores and he wanted the twins left with Gray.

" What do you think he means by Juvia meeting him at the beach? Juvia is awfully confused," The three of us face palmed.

" Juvia he wants to date you," I responded.

" No! No! No! Juvia can't date Lyon-san, Juvia's heart belongs to Gray-sama love rival," Juvia replied angrily.

" I'm not your love rival, I don't like Gray in that way," I waved my arms desperately.

" No she likes Natsu!" Mira clapped.

" Mira he doesn't Natsu has the mental age of a seven year old, besides I want someone sophisticated and after all we are to different he's on the football team so he is popular, I'm in the writing club," I said then I realised I contradicted myself.

" Well I'm captain of the cheerleaders and I'm your friend," Mirajane said hotly and I tried to defend myself.

"Natsu has shown no interest in girls and he basically didn't understand when Lisanna tried to get him to marry her, he is a pink haired dense idiot!" I shook my head.

" He only shows interest when it has anything to do with you though and he trusts you more, even though he has been friends with me, Lisanna and Mira far longer than you Lucy," Cana grinned. I realised this was useless defending myself then I remembered my date with Rogue.

" Well even Natsu did like me, why won't he come out and say it? We are just best friends you three and after all I've got a date with Rogue Cheney on Sunday, so I'd appreciate you both shutting up," I said silencing Cana, Mira and Juvia.

" Lucy you can't date Rogue, he is in team Sabretooth with Minerva and her cronies," Mira complained.

It had been a well known fact that Natsu's Father Igneel and sometimes our coach ran Fairy Tail record company which Coach, Gajeel's father Metallicana and Igneel started when they went to this boarding school and it represented Gildarts and while Rogue's and Sting's ran Sabretooth Record Company. Sabretooth was no where near popular as Fairy Tail but it held rivalry between Sting, Rogue & Natsu, Gajeel.

Now I couldn't get this out of my mind, as I sat down next to Levy and Natsu I tucked into my food. Then I immediately spat it out.

" Natsu! WHY DID YOU PUT EXTRA HOT SPICY SAUCE ON MY FOOD? YOU DENSE IDIOT!" I screeched as I drowned my coke and my whole mouth was on fire. How could Natsu live with this stuff daily?

" Nashi will never learn table manners," Gajeel commented and now I was furious. But it was true both me and Natsu lived like pigs. When Michelle, Gray and Wendy found us pigging out once, Gray called us fat bastards causing Natsu and him to get into a fight.

" Says the man who can't live without eating iron," Levy remarked.

Before Gajeel could react, Cana was dancing on the next table and giving Laxus a strip tease, this was the weirdest sight of my life especially with the guy having a plastic doll in his arms. What the hell is going on with my friends? My eyes popped out of my head. Gajeel, Jellal, Gray and Bixlow couldn't keep their eyes off her.

" There I'll take on any dare, any time and any place," Cana laughed. Then we were kicked out, at least we didn't have to pay. After a long car ride home, which involved stopping for Natsu being sick more than a couple of times. I was ready to murder baby Nashi but I let Happy take the doll off me. Until we got home.

Me and Michelle had our own house near campus which we let out some rooms to our friends, the dormitories were awful and Michelle refused to go into the shower rooms. So she we decided to get a house and we shared it with Levy, Wendy, Erza and Juvia. The Strauss's lived next door to us in their mansion.

As I tucked Nashi up into a fake crib we were given, I had the shock of my life when I saw the window being opened. If it was Damn Straight, I was going to call the police for sexual harassment. Oh Mavis, what if it was a rapist? I looked around my room for a weapon. It was okay, I had Erza in the next room.

" ERZA!" I screeched. " There is a rapist Erza help me I'm going to die! Damn Straight is going to rape me! ERZA!"

I watched the figure climb through my window and I was having a panic attack. Oh God! Where the fuck was Erza? She was my hero! When I last got attacked by Damn Straight, she sent him flying. Natsu, Gray and Loke didn't bother to help me at all. I was especially pissed with Loke, he keeps going on about how he would always be there. My knight in shining armour but no Erza is the true knight!

" Relax Luce! It's just me Natsu, I was coming to see if you needed help with Nashi!" He grinned.

" Why can't you use the door and if you dare take my bed again Natsu!" I yelled.

Erza finally came through the door and she was wearing sexy lingerie. Jellal was behind her in boxers with cheesecake on them, she ran towards Natsu and knocked him onto my bed. I must have interrupted sexy time between Erza and Jellal... Oh Mavis, I'm going to die especially when Jellal had a serious face and he was holding a lamp. Now he was bright scarlet.

" WAIT! I thought you said it was damn straight?" Erza spoke.

" I thought it was to.. I'm sorry Erza and Jellal but when did you two become a couple?" I tried to change the subject then they both shut the door, obviously not wanting to go into that subject. I realised that Natsu was terrified. " I'm sorry Natsu!"

" Luce that was the most terrifying experience of my life," Natsu looked like he was having a heart attack then he lay on the bed.

" Fine you can stay tonight, but you are getting up if Nashi cries!" I spoke snuggling into bed. " What the hell are you doing idiot?" Natsu put an arm around me and he was asleep.

" I love you Luce!" What did he just say?

* * *

_A/N I know perfectly well Damn Straight real name is Dan Straight its just I've christened him Damn Straight now ^.^ I hate the character personally because he kind of weakened Lucy's character and there was no Nalu moments because of it. Mashima made Lucy look weak and helpless. _

_DAMN YOU MASHIMA I wanted Natsu to go all dragon slayer on damn straights ass but no Erza steps in to protect Lucy from the pervert! Natsu where is your sense of pride? Gray could you not done something? And Loke where the fuck were you? WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU LOKE? Seriously I nearly jumped from my Nalu ship at the end of season 1 for Lolu. *Dark times*_

_Jumping ship to Erza and Lucy now yuri for the win :) _

_Mira: You can't you like Nalu to much ;D_

_Me: I know :( but damn you Straight this is all your fault for being a pervert and nearly stabbing Romeo trying to kill off Rowen before my ship has had any moments FUCK U DAMN STRAIGHT! -.- Now my secondary Lucy pairing is Erlu. Loke and Gray don't earn the right they didn't protect Lucy from the pervert with the sharp pointy sword -.- I only forgive Natsu since the shooting star episode melted my fangirl heart :'D Ok I'm getting off topic here just skip past this nonsensical authors note. All you have learnt here is I'm never gonna call Damn Straight by his real name :D_


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